Happy Mother's Day....from a waiting mother.

When I woke up this morning, I knew I was going to have mixed feelings about today.  You see, it's Mother's Day....and well, none of my babies are in my arms today.

Sunday, May 8th, 2011 - Mother's Day 2011 - Brandon and I found out I was pregnant with our first baby!  We couldn't believe it and even took numerous tests to be sure. :)  A couple of weeks later, I started spotting - but nothing too concerning. We were able to have an ultrasound and saw the heartbeat of our little one.  The spotting mostly went away, and we felt like things would be ok - but were scheduled for follow up soon.  After about a week, the spotting came back, but when we had an ultrasound we were still able to see a heartbeat, but the baby had not grown much over that time period.  Another week later, and I had lost the baby.  We were unusual that we were able to see the heartbeat twice before I miscarried, which led our doctor to believe that my miscarriage was due to a chromosomal abnormality.

Last summer was rough, LOTS of healing happened. (Physically, emotionally, and spiritually)  And in the time, I was introduced to this amazing ministry called Reece's Rainbow.  This ministry that advocates for orphans around the world, with special needs - primarily down syndrome.  God really placed those orphans heavy on my heart over the summer months, and by August or so, Brandon and I were pretty sure that this what God was calling us to.

As the pieces all started to fall into place, it became so evident to us that God's hand has been in all of it.  Brandon and I have always known we would adopt.  It's always been a part of our plan for our family.  And we knew we would be open to adopting a child or children with special needs.  But when I began to understand what life was like for these children, who were abandoned because of a chromosomal abnormality.  The same thing that took our baby too soon, that we were never able to hold in our arms.  These babies are given up, because they have a little extra chromosome - and their families don't know or don't understand that not only are their lives worth something, but that these beautiful children will grow up to be beautiful adults, who are fully capable of doing anything they want to, given the right opportunities.   We so wanted our baby, regardless of the chromosomal abnormalities he or she might have had, but we didn't get that opportunity.  We are honored and blessed to be able to give that opportunity to two precious girls.

So here we are now, a year later.  God has done a LOT in our lives over this past year!  Many of you have been praying for us over the past year, and we appreciate that so much.  But it's Mother's Day, and once again, my babies aren't in my arms.  This time though - they 're on the other side of the world.  Soon we'll be holding them in our arms, and we will begin to show them and teach them what the love of a family is. 

Today I celebrated my first Mother's Day, with a sweet card from my husband and donuts for breakfast!   Nope, they're not in my arms yet - but they are in my heart.  All three of them.  One waiting for me in Heaven and two waiting for me in Ru$$ia. 

P.S.  If you really want to make this Mother's Day special....consider making a donation to our Reece's Rainbow Fund.....or to the fund of another waiting mama, I'd be happy to share links to some of my friends who are waiting to hold their babies in their arms as well!!